Parenting Isn't Pretty

Just what the title says parenting isn't pretty. Parenting is not all rainbows and butterflies. It's the hardest most rewarding job you will ever have.

It's messy, it's sleep deprivation, it's frustrating, it's long hours, it's always being on call even when you are sick, it's being judged by others on how you parent and its just plain and simply life altering.

There are so many pressures today to be the perfect mother making your child's childhood from conception to graduation this magical time. We are expected to work full time, clean the house, shuffle them to their activities, be class mom, make 20 something little doodads for whatever class holiday they're celebrating now, cook a spectacularly wonderful healthy dinner all while making sure they have creative and charming activities to do and constantly entertain them.

This is not reality for the majority of Mom's out there.  My daughter is not a gamer or even a technologically inclined kid. She does not have an iPad, she does not know how to use a computer and she does not prefer to play her learning tab video thing.

Instead she has this wonderful imagination where princess' have sleep overs, coloring and taping pictures all over our house is the norm, and playing outside where the queens and fairies work together to thwart an evil doer. She even has two imaginary sisters who she has given so much detail that when she tells a story about them people think they are real.

We have decided to let our child be a child. To have the childhood we had where we created our own fun and didn't rely on our parents for constant entertainment. I want my daughter to remember the traditions we create together no matter how small, running around with her friends, getting dirty, and enjoying being a kid.

We encourage her to accept it when she loses at a game because there are generally no second chances and definitely none of this everyone wins and I deserve everything handed to me mentality in the real world.

So in my mind not only is parenting not pretty but it's even worse when trying to go against the grain of the societal norm. Mother's attacking each other and putting each other down because she didn't hand make those Valentine's day cards.

There are plenty of tough decisions you will make as a parent and breaking each other down because of our choices helps no one. Not supporting each other is the last thing we should be doing. Mom's need other Mom's and their experiences. Sometimes you just need to vent to another Mom and know you won't be judged but supported and encouraged.

We should be allowing our kids to make mistakes and take responsibility for their actions as well as entertain themselves. We are not doing our kids justice if we don't allow them to learn and experience the world around them. I admit I am a worry wort but I do let her do things that she may have a natural consequence for. I do spend lots of time with her dreaming and playing. I just don't feel the need to plan each second or constantly be at her side.

Nothing is perfect. Find the rhythm that works for your family and stick to it. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise as they don't live your life.

And Just remember to breathe, no one is a perfect parent, apologize when you make mistakes and grow together. After all we all turned out alright.